Kicked to the curb...

I've never been a fan of Murphy's law: "Anything that can go wrong will go wrong". I always regarded Murphy as a pessimist, and more to the point: Who the hell is Murphy anyway? As I get older however, I have to hand it to Mr Murphy- he may have a point with things going wrong - especially at the last minute.

After two years of working for a Korean bank, I have recently been counting my lucky stars for not being sexually harassed too much. Specifically, I have been relishing the fact that I have been tactful enough not to step on any of my colleagues' toes when letting them know that being MBA (Married But Available) is of no interest to me whatsoever. They seemed to get it - even respect it.

So with less than two weeks to go until I jump this corporate ship, I have started to relax. I have become more communicative, and have even begun to joke with my colleagues; I figured I will surely, no longer be perceived as a Western 'good time girl'. WRONG. Oh my, how wrong could I have been???

Yesterday, as I was leaving the office for the day I got approached by the new investment banker in the Dept. He asked me to dinner last week and I agreed as I was under the impression others would join us. WRONG AGAIN. He informed me to 'not tell anyone, as it was just us going'. Just US...as in a DATE??? The guy may be MBA but I am NFW going on a date with a family man - even if he does have dapper sense of fashion.

The dinner invitation put me in a bit of a predicament. Would I: a) go for dinner and let him down gently by telling him I'm a lesbian, or b) confront things head on by telling him that he's waaaaaaaaaaay out of order. It took me a while to figure out what I'd do. After all, this is Korea - where paternalistic management prevails, and chaemyoun (saving face) is EVERYTHING. That being said, I am not Korean, and I don't give a damn about chaemyoun. Korea is a highly Confucian society, and the Confucian Golden Rule is: ''Do unto others as you would have them do unto you." I would be devastated if my man was having dinner with other women, so I had no option but to decline.

I wrote a note to him as I do not have his email, and didn't dare approach him in person. It read:

''Thank you for the dinner invitation. Unfortunately, I must decline as I do not think it appropriate for us to go to dinner alone''.

He replied (in note form):

''Ruth, There seems to be some kind of misunderstanding. But I fully understand why you're thinking like that. I admit my behaviour can be misleading to you. Anyhow, I'm sorry for making you feel uncomfortable. Have a good one!''

**Since we exchanged notes, we have avoided all forms of communication and unnecessary eye contact. I expect that this will continue until I leave next week.

So there you have it ladies. Korean men are more temperamental than the female form, and yes...like men in general, they too have a problem with avoiding personal accountability!!